Now at my godsister's house. There is something I really want to do now. I dunno why but I just wanna sit at the steps of the one fullerton area, in front of the merlion. Wish I am there, I wanna be all alone, just sitting on the steps watching the sky changing colour from a warm orange to a bluish-black one. Wanna see the lights flickered on one by one as time passed. Dunno why I wanna do tat, just feel like crying. Cry... cry over... I dunno wad. Recently I started wondering how things will be like during judgement day, wad if judgement day was just a few days away. Started thinking about death... Yes, I am a christian, I am saved but wad about my frens and family members who dun believed in Christ. I will cry and be really upset, upset that they wont get to go to heaven. Quite a few events happened this week and it led me to think about the meaning of life, about death and about judgement day. Haiz~ Just wish I am sitting on the steps now cos I cant gaurantee I get to see it ever again.

Haiz~ Enough about all tat. Tml is museum day. I wanna go Singapore Philatelic museum to view exhibits. Guess I go alone once more. Just kinda sad that I dun know any frens who have the same interests as me, dunno anyone who likes to go museum. Haha I know I like shopping but to tell the truth there is something else I like more. Bet a lot people find it boring but I dun. I love bookstores especially the one at taka, KINOKUNIYA. I can spend more than 5hrs there. I walk down those book shelfs and stop at sections that I am interested in and then I browse thru every book from each section, reading a few pages here and there. Haha I dunno y I love that, its just that the pictures from the books and all are all so captivating, I feel like I am in another world, doing wad I like, exploring other people's cultures. I love libraries too and I love museums, love musical performances, love the exhibits but sometimes it can be sad to actually do it alone. No one to share the joy with. Oh well... In that case, I share it with God then, like I usually do. Who ask me to have such weird interests. Haha :) Oh well, as long I enjoy doing it can liao I guess, shall not bother wad other people think since in the first place, they are not me. :) Yeah tml I can spend my day after church at the museum and then at esplanade park. Love that a lot! Dunno suzanna jie jie , joshua they all will accompany me a not. Most probably not since ge ge most likely wont want. Oh well, in that case, its alright!

Was looking at e 4 photos tat Si Hui send me. They were the photos tat we took when we gave Pei Shi a surprise "send off" at the airport. I miss Pei Shi. I miss Jing Ting too... Cant believe I didnt get to send her off. HAIZ~ I miss my carefree life... My life has now been replaced by work. TOTAL BOREDOM. I am SO SO SO SO SO GLAD tat in the future I be working in the area of arts where there be no routine work and tat everything will be different each time. I would love tat. I really wonder how my life will be 5 or 10 years down the road. Will I work overseas or stay in Singapore instead? I really wonder. Got a feeling that once I start school, life wont be the same as before. It wont be as boring as JC or as sec sch. I can for once study sth I love and have a passion for. So glad tat God answered my prayers. Finally after like more than 6 over years, my prayer is answered. Haha Guess it is really true that God knows wad is best for us and He knows when is the right timing to give us too. SO GLAD! Must always trust in Him! Finally my life is getting somewhere. ALL THANKS TO GOD! YEAH!

[Twista talking]

Man, I know we had a lot of tragedies lately.

I just wanna say rest in peace to Aaliyah,

Rest in peace to Left Eye,

Rest in peace to Jam Master Jay,

And everybody lost in the Twin Towers,

And everybody lost period.

All we got is HOPE!!

[VERSE 1 (Twista)]

I wish the way I was living could stop, serving rocks,

Knowing the cops is hot when I'm on the block,

And I, Wish my brother woulda made bail,

So I won't have to travel 6 hours to see him in jail,

And I, Wish that my grandmother wasn't sick,

Or that we would just come up on some stacks and hit a lick,

And I (I wish), Wish my homies wouldn't have to suffer,

When the streets get the upper hand on us
And we lose a brother, And I

Wish I could go deep in a zone,

And lift the spirits of the world
With the words within this song, And I (I wish)

Wish I could teach a could teach a soul to fly,

Take away the pain out cha hands
And help you hold them high, And I

Wish God never gave the men power

To be able to hurt the people inside the Twin Towers,

And I (I wish),
Wish God woulda turned they hearts righteous,

When they started to take innocent lives
And become snipers, But uh

We will never break, don't underestimate, we shall motivate,

And we gotta pray, all we got is faith.

Instead of thinking about who gonna die today,

The Lord is gonna help you feel better,
So you ain't gotta cry today.

Sit at the light so long,

And then we gotta move straight forward,
Cuz we fight so strong,

So when right go wrong,

Just say a little prayer, get ya money man, life go on!!!

Let's HOPE!

[CHORUS (Cee-Lo)]

Cuz I'm hopeful, yes I am, hopeful for today,

Take this music and use it

Let it take you away,

And be hopeful (hopeful) and he'll make a way

I know it ain't easy but that's okay.

Let's be hopeful!

[VERSE 2 (Twista)]

I wish that you could show some love,

Instead of hatin so much
When you see some other people commin up (I wish)

I wish I could teach the world to sing,

Watch the music and have em trippin of the joy I bring, (sh**)

I wish that we could hold hands,

Listen instead of dissin lessons from a grown man,
And I (I wish)

Wish the families that lack, but got love, get some stacks

Brand new shack and a lack that's on dubs, And I

Wish we could keep achieving wonders,

See the vision of the world
Through the eyes of Stevie Wonder, (you feel me) (I wish)

And I hope all the kids eat,

And don't nobody in my family see six feet, (ya dig)

I hope them mothers stain? strong,

You can make it whether you wit him or your mans gone, And I (I wish)

Wish I could give every celly some commissary,

And the po po bring the heat on them priest
Like they did R. Kelly, And I

Wish that DOC could scream again

And bullets could reverse so Pac and Biggie breath again, (sh**) (I wish)

Then one day they could speak again,

I wish that we only saw good news
Every time we look at CNN,

I wish that enemies could talk,

And that super homie Christopher Reeves could still walk,
(I wish)

I wish that we could walk a path, stay doin the right thing

Hustle hard so the kids maintain up in the game,

Let's HOPE

[CHORUS (Cee-Lo)]

Cuz I'm hopeful, yes I am, hopeful for today,

Take this music and use it

Let it take you away,

And be hopeful (hopeful) and he'll make a way

I know it ain't easy but that's okay.

Let's be hopeful!

[VERSE 3 (Twista)]

Wish the earth wasn't so apocalyptic,

I try to spread my message to the world
The best way I can give it,

We can make it always so optimistic,

If you don't listen gotta live my life the best way I can live it,

I pray for justice when we go to court,

Wish it was all good
So the country wouldn't have to go to war,

Why can't we kick it and just get em on,

And in the famous words of Mr. King
"Why can't we all just get along",

Or we can find a better way to shop and please, And I

Hope we find a better way to cop a keys, And I

Wish everybody would just stop and freeze,

And ask way are we fulfillin these downfalls and prophecies,

You can be wrong if it's you doubting,

With the faith of a must to see drinkin moon mountains,

And only the heavenly father and ease the hurt,

Just let it go and keep prayin on your knees in church!!

And let's HOPE

[CHORUS (Cee-Lo) X2]

Cuz I'm hopeful, yes I am, hopeful for today,

Take this music and use it

Let it take you away,

And be hopeful (hopeful) and he'll make a way

I know it ain't easy but that's okay.

Let's be hopeful!

[BACKGROUND]

na-na-na-na-na-na-naaaa-naaa

na-na-na-na-na-na-naaaa-naaa

na-na-na-na-na-na

na-na-na-na-na-na

na-na-na-na-na-na-naaaa-naaa

na-na-na-na-na-na-naaaa-naaa

na-na-na-na-na-na-naaaa-naaa

na-na-na-na-na-na

na-na-na-na-na-na

I love this song. Dunno why but I really love songs sang by people like R. Kelly, Nelly, Usher, Alicia Keys, Twista, Faith Evans, Luther Vandross etc. Their songs rock. Haha... Their rapping is damn good. Haha especially TWISTA! Love the song!!! Haha Think I mostly proably wanna buy "Coach Carter" VCD and CD. Dun mind showing it since its such a great great show and dun mind the cd, love the songs. Haha.

Haiz~ Love inspirational movies. I hate horror movies. Wad a waste of money to go to the cinema to be spooked out by wads on screen. I rather watched a movie tat in the end teaches me about another aspect of life. Now tat is so worth the money or a comedy is not bad too. Dun mind laughing at e stuff going on screen. Hee hee... Today spend so much time online, its really a long long time I have been online for tat long. Wanna go offline do some drawings but I cant seemed to stop myself from watching the "Hope" MTV over and over again. Go to http://www.blastro.com/player/twistahope.html?bitrate=_128&mediatype=wmv&x=28&y=9 to watch the MTV. Ok I shall listen to it once more before I go do some drawings. Must start studying before school starts then can catch up wif wad the lecturer is teaching. Haha

Haiz WORK IS SO STRESSFUL. I am currently working at Mazda motors at Macpherson road. Guess u may wondering where it is.. its near erm... Bedok, Enous, Aljunid tat area. Super far from where I lived but since got direct bus so its alright.

Haiz was made to answer phone calls. I DUN WANNA ANSWER PHONE CALLS. Its really a stupid thing to make me answer phone calls and then to transfer to my collegues cos I dunno how to answer the customers. HELLO??? HOW IN THE WORLD DO I KNOW WAD IS alternator??? third mileage??? sun riser??? battery light not working??? bio-rotation??? I am so clueless about it all. So each time I pick up the phone it goes like this...

Me: Morning, Madza services

Customer: blah blah blah...

Me: Could you hold on for a while (directed to customer)

Ivy, I dunno wad customer is talking... blah blah blah

So wads the point of making me answer calls when in the end my collegues have to answer them. It took me quite some time to observe and figure out how to transfer phone calls cos no one teach me how to do so. Haiz~ The most scary part when all of my collegues even the boss disappear from the office and left me alone... ALONE all in the office. Was praying hard that the phone didnt ring. I seriously know nuts about cars and their parts and the service or repair and the cost of doing it. Haiz~ The following weeks to come... I think I am going to die.

Wads up with the stupid rain... kept raining each time I forgot to bring umbrella. ARGH!!! Yesterday I was like thinking to myself "better bring umbrella tml and bring it along during lunch break in case rain"... BUT I FORGOT then today lunch break, IT RAINS!!! ARGH!!! I kept getting wet and the office air-con kept blowing me... thanks a lot... I going to fall ill soon if this goes on.

Haiz so tired now... Me thinking whether I should seriously quit guitar lesson. I just dun have time to practise and my interest in guotar just isnt there. I prefer the piano... love it in fact. I can just practice it for hours without knowing. As for guitar, just 10mins on it and I dun feel like playing. Haiz~ should really make a decision soon. Dun wanna waste time on sth tat my heart does not set on doing.

Haiz... U know wad I wish to do right now... wish I am lying on a hammock at the beach, listening to the waves and gaze at the stars. Just wanna take my mind off everything.

YEAH!!! I am so happy I got into School of Arts, design and media... MY DREAM COURSE! I guess I only have God to thank. I have always love the arts but there just wasnt any opportunity to pursue it. As life goes on from pri to sec to jc, my chances of ever studying arts grew thinner. I was kinda moving more towards the sci bit. I really should not doubt God at all. He has in fact heard my prayers and answered them. He knew I didnt wanna go private school just to study arts cos tat is like wasting 2 years of my life in jc. Somehow or another, it was this very year tat e school of arts, design and media was introduced in NTU. Its really surprising tat somehow or another I kept seeing the advertisement of this course and tat my frens started telling me to go study tat. I really wanted it but the course requirements put me off. Can u imagine it... at most 10mins of video, at most 400words essay and 5 photographs of a particular theme. Good thing, Ting asked me this qns: Which is better, to study in NUS but not get into your dream course or to study your dream course and go to a university tat I dun really wanna go. It was then tat I decided to go for it. I dun think its a coincidence tat all these happens... God has planned it that way and I really glad tat I trust Him. God guided me thru it all... even though I thought I didnt do very well for my video and 1/4 of my faculty test was quite badly done but I still got in. NOW I AM REALLY HAPPY! Cant wait to start school. I am going to love it so much. Must really thanks God for it... If it weren't for Him, I dunno where I be.